Girlfriend has cat.

Cat Vinny

Girlfriend becomes wife.  Wife’s cat poops and pukes.  You learn to clean up both.  You gag a lot.  Maybe even throw up in your mouth.

Dog Charlie

Then, you get a dog who’s poop is approaching the smell of your own and at times, surpassing it.  And thats why you gag when picking it up.  Gone are the days when you could leave that neatly spun muffin on the neighbors front yard.

Soon, you and the wife have a child.  Seemed like a really good idea at that moment.

“Baby’s don’t poop” she tells you.

Ah, but they do.  Hazel’s poop is at the yellow grainy runny stage.  It is a truly horrifying specter.  Or, it looks like German course mustard.  Really, it depends on your mood.

It is in this way that our lives have become more and more marked by the quality and characteristics of poop coming out of some furry being that we love.  And so the progression continues.

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